This one. She’s feeling shy lately. We had a talk about sharing her story, and she decided that she doesn’t want to share it for awhile…so I’m going with it. Don’t go thinking we forgot about her. She’s very here, quite loud and of course the best girl in the whole world. Henry is lucky to have such a sister and we, I can’t even describe how much we love this little gorgeous, insane, silly little nut.
If you have questions about being a foster adopt parent I am more than happy to answer them. It was one of the best things we ever did.


  • Hi,
    Came across your insta and later blog after going down the rabbit’s hole that is social media/the internet way past my bedtime a couple of weeks ago (which is basically my routine). My fost-adopt daughter is 9. I’ve had her a year (feels like much longer). I straight fostered for a short while before CJ came into my life- she was exactly who I didn’t know I wanted/needed. My under age 5, no history of (fill in the blanks) (basically every one of my previously specified ‘hard no’ qualifications for fostering) dissipated when I met her. Even though she had a raging case of head lice and pink eye. And hated me. I knew she was meant to be with me. She is now legally free but we are pending (ridiculous) appeals. And about to embark on the journey again, but this time as a duo. Girl wants a sister (her bio sibs were all placed with different families) and I want her to have one (I have three, I could never deny her the awesomeness). I overuse parentheses like just about everyone on the internet. Sorry.

    Anyway. Your story and photos of Ry (and Henry) inspire me. I love meeting/discovering other fost-adopt moms who are making it. My mom died when I was young which adds a twist to this mothering gig. I just appreciate your candid and honest words and images-this experience has been amazing but can also feel lonely and full of self-doubt. Inspiration is good. So thank you.
    Erin (in SF ish)

  • Hi Erin!

    Thanks so much for your comment. Ugh I was so freaked out that Ry wasnt legally free. I feel like we got so lucky. She was our FIRST foster child and our last. I think our last. Its insane this love right? Totally insane. Im so glad you found each other and are trying to get her a sibling. Sorry misread that and thought you were trying to get HER siblings. Is the adoption going to open or closed? My mother died right before my wedding, so I was a little older but I know how to feels to parent being a motherless mother. I hope to hear from you soon. And please feel free to email me any time, if you want to continue to talk, off the record. I love new people.


  • So glad I remembered to come back and check this post again. I am going to send you an email, if you don’t mind, to talk about some of the specifics since it isn’t exactly my story to divulge but I would like your perspective on a few things, if you have time. Excuse the run-on sentence, another fault. We are going down the quasi open adoption road….trying to anyway. There have been many stumbling blocks. I’m struggling with balance….luckily (?) the more settled CJ gets the less they seem like a factor. She’s just so busy with her life and I think is realizing, in her way, that they don’t fit into it. And her story is horrific and so full of abuse and trauma that I walk a very, very fine line. Her therapist tells me that a somewhat open door is healthier for her and better for our relationship long term so I try to keep an open mind (ish).

    I’ll send you an email soon. Thank you for your kind and warm reply.


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